You Should Try At Least One Wasabi Peanut

Yeah, those little green balls, look like peanut M&Ms. But they’re not. I mean, they’re peanut, but they’re not chocolate. I don’t want to mislead you about that. They’re so not chocolate.

Wasabi. It’s Japanese. I mean, the peanuts are American – I think they’re American, I don’t know where else they grow peanuts. But the wasabi is Japanese. It’s like fusion or something.

I know you don’t like Japanese food, but this is really good. Besides, just because it’s Japanese doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try it, at least. Remember when I got you to try Sudoku? That was Japanese. And you play that every day.

I know Sudoku isn’t a type of food, I’m just making a comparison.

Wasabi? It’s not – it’s not anything really exotic. It’s just the Japanese word for horseradish.

Yeah, horseradish. Horseradish isn’t bad. You eat horseradish. Yes, you do. I’ve seen you. Cocktail sauce? What do you think is in cocktail sauce? Horseradish, that’s what. Look at the ingredients. You eat cocktail sauce, that’s not any worse than a delicious wasabi peanut.

I know you don’t like hot and spicy food. But it’s just horseradish. It’s not that spicy. It’s mild. It’ll just clean out your sinuses a little, that’s all.

I’m not saying to eat like six of them at a time. Because that would be abusive. I mean, yeah, there was that time I ate half a package watching the Steelers-Titans game, and you kept asking me why I was crying. That was the wasabi. But you can just try one; it won’t hurt you.

No. This is not at all like the time I got you to try that hot Vietnamese rooster sauce. That was a prank. And no, it wasn’t very nice. And I am sorry about that. I said so at the time. This is not anything like that. Or the time I got you to eat that dried pepper in my kung pao. I mean, it was funny. I know you didn’t think it was funny at the time, and you threw that egg roll at me, but we can look back on that now and laugh. Right?

Sweetie, I am not trying to get you to eat anything bad. It’s just one wasabi peanut. And they’re really good. The shell is really crunchy, and then you bite into it, and you get the peanut and the horseradish, and it’s a very strong, very complicated flavor.

Just try one.

You might like it. You don’t know.

I’m not saying dip it in Tabasco sauce and roll it in cayenne pepper. Just taste it. For me.

You just said a minute ago you wanted a snack.

Okay, that’s how you feel. I think there are some yogurt pretzels in the pantry. Nice, bland, safe tasteless yogurt pretzels. If you don’t want to try something new, that’s fine.

Come on. Just one.

Leave a Reply